"BS" was a GREAT nickname.....

Let me tell you why some men are morons (and here I may or may not be referring to BS - ok, I am):

1. They underestimate the female brain (specifically, Rachel's brain).
2. They say shit they don't mean because they're too damn wimpy to say the truth ("I'm so busy with work that I just don't think I can have a full-time relationship until things there settle down.")
3. They forget your birthday, only to call two days later and say, "Sorry I'm a day late."
4. They continue to call and email even after you have decided to not see each other anymore (I call this the Finger Dance, which I'll explain in a moment).
5. THEY GO BACK ON MATCH.COM WHERE WE MET IN THE FIRST PLACE.

Ahem.

One of the most discouraging moments in our dating lives is when we meet a "great" guy and after some time, they prove themselves to be "just like the rest of them". Now, in no way am I saying ALL guys are like this, but, I know for a fact, every single woman has said at some point or another - "I just really thought he was different." I just happened to say it on my BLOG. BS (amazing how that was his nickname from the get-go - I should have taken that as a hint) is one such person.

The other day, AFTER he began emailing me and calling me again, I decided to see if he had put himself back on match.com - call it a hunch. Sure enough, I signed on as a guest (since I've retired from there) and there he was. Boot Scootin' his way into the hearts of other So Cal sweethearts with his sweet profile and dashing good looks. I had to laugh. How could he even think for a moment that I wasn't going to find out? Mr. I-Have-No-Time really should have been Mr. I'm-Going-To-Look-For-Something-Better. Unbelievable. Hey, at least I got a cruise out of the situation.

My favorite part of the situation is the Finger Dance. This is when a guy continues to keep his finger on your pulse because he doesn't want to totally break free in case there isn't something better out there. So he'll call/email/text you sporadically just to let you know that he's still thinking of you and give you a hint that you shouldn't be looking elsewhere (even though he is - hello? match.com). Some women fall for it, thinking, "he's just confused - he'll come around - I mean, he's still thinking of me". NO. I used to think that way too, but, now I just find it amusing and to be honest, d-e-s-p-e-r-a-t-e. Finger Dance = BAD. Don't condone it - don't do it. It's lame and I rate it an F-. Just never underestimate the brain of a female. We're paranoid, neurotic and lack certain boundaries - we're going to figure you out.

So, as we all knew a couple months ago (but it just continues to get verification), he wasn't the kind of guy I thought he was. He wasn't "different".

And as a sidenote, to add insult to injury, I got the "I want you back" speech from Midget Matt this past weekend. I mean, come on....two years later? It never ceases to amaze me - when it rains, it pours - the finger dances just keep on coming....

Calgon, take me away!